
Labiausiai įprasta keliauti grupėmis. Kai kam tai didelis malonumas, bet užsidariusiems tarp artimųjų ar apsuptiems paklusnių pavaldinių žmonėms tai tampa nemažu išbandymu. Grupėje reikia taikytis prie kitų žmonių ir prie bendrų taisyklių: „Žmonės grupėje dažnai virsta į bandą – klausoma to, kas garsiau rėkia“; „Pirma visi lekia iš visų jėgų, o po to ilgai stovi ir tauškia niekus“; “Nekenčiu, kai šalia keliauja lietuviškos šeimos, nuo jų atsiriboti gali tik viešbutyje, o lėktuve jų klausytis neįmanoma – vaikai cypia, vyrai nusišalinę, moterys viską reguliuoja“.
Nuo bendrakeleivių nepabėgsi, bet galima juos suprasti ir nekaupti nuoskaudų, ar net daryti teigiamą įtaką tam, kas vyksta, pakreipti pokalbį norima tema, t. y. mokytis lyderiauti pačiam. Prisitaikyti prie kitoniškų žmonių ypač sunku tiems, kurie gyvena savo uždarame pasaulyje pagal metų metais nesikeičiančias taisykles: „Mano mama porą kartų per metus išsiruošdavo pas gimines. Bijodama nepatogių lovų ji veždavosi savo čiužinį, įsidėdavo savo maisto, kadangi kartu veždavosi šunį, labai nuogąstaudavo, kad jis svetimoje aplinkoje ko nors nesuėstų ir nesusirgtų, bet svečiuose ji vis tiek labai kentėdavo ir iš tikro atsigaudavo tik grįžus namo. Po to dar savaitę nagrinėdavo, kas ką ne taip pasakė. Dabar ji iš viso niekur nebevažiuoja.“
Ne taip retai kelionėse įvyksta rimti konfliktai, kai kurie žmonės net vengia keliauti su draugais, bijodami jų netekti. Poros kelionių metu patiria intensyvesnius santykius – dažniau susipyksta, bet ir labiau suartėja, prisiriša. Artumo kelionėje daug daugiau, negu įprasta ar reikia, todėl po kelionių dažnai kyla noras vienam nuo kito pailsėti ir atsitraukti. Ypač pavojingos kelionėje situacijos, kai išsiskiria norai. Pvz., grupelė žmonių, darniai keliavusi po kalnus, mieste staiga tampa visiškai skirtingų interesų: vienas nori sėdėti bare, kitas – kuo daugiau apžiūrėti,, trečias veržiasi į parduotuves, ketvirtas – į muziejus. Jeigu jie vienas kito lauks, nebus patenkinti nė vieno poreikiai, todėl svarbu nesipykti ir laiku rasti logiškus kompromisus. Bet toks derinimasis gali prasidėti kiekviename žingsnyje ir labai varginti, todėl kur kas lengviau, kai grupėje yra pakankamai žmonių, kuriems malonu tiesiog prisitaikyti, jausti malonumą, kai juos kažkas kažkur vedasi: „Pačiai vadovaujant reikėtų daug mąstyti – lyg darbe. Per atostogas man labiausiai patinka atsipalaiduoti: tegul mane kaip avį kur nors vedasi, o aš eisiu iš paskos ir mėgausiuos“.
Kai kurie keliauja vieni. Tuomet taikytis prie kitų reikia mažiau, bet galvoti – daugiau. Puikiu, jei jie sugeba atsipalaiduoti nuo nuolatinio kelionės planavimo ir tiesiog leisti atsitikti tam, kas atsitinka, pvz., be plano vaikštinėti gatvėmis. Tai visada yra savarankiškumo ir sugebėjimo bendrauti išbandymas. Reikia daug ką nuspręsti, pasiklausti. Atsiranda būtinybė nustatyti tam tikrą atstumą su bendrakeleiviais ir vietiniais gyventojais: Pietuose – apginti savo erdvę, Šiaurėje – įveikti atstumą. Kai kurie žmonės taip sunkiai susitvarko su, pvz., įkyriais musulmonų prekeiviais, kad daugiau nebegali keliauti į tuos kraštus. Kai kurie keliaudami vieni jaučiasi liūdni ir vieniši, kiti – randa daugybę naujų pažįstamų.
Kartais, neradus artimų bendražygių, tenka jungtis prie mažai pažįstamų žmonių. Buvimas su svetimais žmonėmis, šalia kurių sunkiau parodyti savo tikrąsias mintis ir norus, yra išbandymas. Iš pradžių negilūs ryšiai mažai daro įtakos nuotaikai, ir žmogus akis į akį atsiduria su savo vienatve. Kokia bus vienatvė, labai priklauso nuo to, kokie ryšiai liko namie. Jei artimieji jums labai daug duoda, jų aštriai truks, jei artumas netikras – kelionėje ta tuštuma išryškės, jei donoras esate jūs – kaip tik atsigausite: „Kodėl tiek daug jėgų? Šiame žemės taške toli nuo namų niekas manęs nepažįsta. Žmogus be istorijos, be vardo, judėjimas – vienintelis būdas gyvenimui užpildyti. Tik ausyse vis girdisi mano mobilaus telefono melodija, kažkas man skambina ir neprisiskambina.“ Vėliau suartėjama su bendrakeleiviais. Paprastai šie ryšiai nuoširdūs ir tikri, nes žmogus kelionėje atsiskleidžia: tai, kuo jis domisi, jo nuotaika, egoizmo lygis, valdingumas. Jei norite įsigyti tikrų draugų – ieškokite jų kelionėse!
Keliavimas su kitais daug daugiau duoda nei atima: nors kelionės metu bendrakeleiviai įkyri, grįžus jų stipriai ilgimasi. Keliaujant grupe dingsta vienišumo, liūdesio jausmas, galima pagyventi kartu ir išsilaisvinti nuo savo įpročių: „Grupėje aš kaip po antklode, susupkite ir užliūliuokite, kad nieko neprisiminčiau apie save. Laisvė būti ir būti kartu.“ „Kelionės draugų tuoj neliks šalia ir lengvumo būsena galbūt išnyks.“ Trumpam galima pagyventi bendruomeninėje sąmonėje, pajausti, kad padėti kitam būna naudingiau, negu rūpintis vien savimi.
Straipsnis pirmą kart buvo publikuotas:
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